White coat. Heels.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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