I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
