Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize