hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Randomize
