evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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