Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
