The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
