How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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