dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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