i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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