Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
