Already got asked if we're dating
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize