It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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