Sponge bath it is.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
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