Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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