Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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