this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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