So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
