yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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