Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
