id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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