We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
