its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
