It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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