we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Randomize
