I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
