dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
