is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize