apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
high people should be assigned attendants
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
