So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
