Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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