whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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