If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
