I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
thus making me awesome and them whores
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
