So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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