You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
