Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
