i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
May the power of my ass compel you!!
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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