we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
