Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize