Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize