in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Be still, my beating vagina.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
