So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
