Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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