Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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