Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
