so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Dignity is for republicans.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
