Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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