Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
