we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
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