Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
